Wife and I are big fans of what I call strategic living, which looks like minimalism at a glance. Maybe a better term is essentialism, like the book of the same name.

Still, we feel drawn toward things which seem like they will make us happy.

There is a sad truth, however — no “thing” will make you happy. “More” will not bring you happiness.

But contentment will.

Wife and I use an inside joke to remind ourselves we will never be happy unless we are first content. We say, “… THEN I’ll be happy” sarcastically after sharing something we want.

For example:

• “Let’s take a motorcycle trip — THEN I’ll be happy.”
• “If only my job paid more, THEN I would be happy.”

The more you draw out the word “then” the more fun it is. “Theeennnnnnn I’ll be happy.” Try it!

After having fun with sarcasm, we laugh knowing happiness is temporary and fleeting compared to the lasting joy of contentment. God has already blessed us with more than we can fully understand. We need to be fully grateful for it all and stop wanting more and more!

“It is better to be satisfied with what you have than to be always wanting something else.”
— Ecclesiastes 6:9

Contentment is not tied to any tax bracket, income, or lifestyle. It is not linked to climate, family size, career path, or number of possessions. It has nothing to do with cars, houses, sex, or friends.

Contentment is a state of mind.

It’s evasive. You won’t stumble upon it accidentally. It takes active effort to be grateful for what you have and thoroughly enjoy it.

Still not buying it? Contentment sounds pretty lame to you? Fair enough — it’s entirely your choice.

But what is your alternative?

I’m not talking about the helpful “constructive criticism” a good mentor provides. I mean the gritty, harsh, in-your-face, tell all your friends to stay away, one-star review criticism.

This type of criticism is a good thing.

Why? Let’s examine several reasons.

1. Criticism often contains useful information.

Sometimes criticism can be more honest and helpful than positive feedback. Leave it to your critics to find the flaw in your masterpiece and expose it for you to acknowledge and address.

Though I realize some comments are unnecessarily harsh and intend to hurt others, much of it has an element of truth you can use to improve your work. Don’t ignore the pearls hidden in these smelly oysters!

2. It helps you refine your target audience.

Think about it. The people who hate your guts and tear your efforts apart probably aren’t the people you are trying so desperately to reach.

This helps you narrow your efforts to the intended market.

3. It can be pretty entertaining.

Have you ever gotten a hateful, negative comment that didn’t make any sense? Or one which completely missed the point of your work? This is what I call a ricochet. I dare you to collect odd-ball, overly-negative responses just for the sake of amusement!

4. Your work is worth criticizing!

No one can critique you until you do something. You stuck your neck out, and you followed through on something.

Think about it. No one can give you a horrible book review until you have actually written a book!

Conclusion

The only way to avoid criticism is to avoid doing anything important. Compared to this, bad reviews don’t sound so bad anymore!

We had never owned China before. Instead, we just had traditional white dishes — a complete, matching set of plates and bowls. The everyday, durable kind. We had enough to serve twelve. Seems reasonable for a family of two, right?

When we moved into a tiny studio apartment with few cupboards, we had no choice. Most of our beloved dishes had to go. We decided on a complete set of dishes with service for six. Nothing more.

Well, if we could only have a few dishes, wife wanted them to be fun!

We enjoyed finding used China together. Dishes which are pretty but not too girly. The kind of China people put in a fancy glass cabinet to protect them from getting chipped or cracked or otherwise damaged.

Except that we use our China every day.

We’re done storing things for undefined future use. “Having your cake” is just not for us.

The plates and bowls aren’t perfect anymore. There are definitely a few chips and hairline cracks.

But we want our stuff to wear out from use instead of collecting dust. No more saving it for the next owner!

We’re eating our cake.

And it tastes great.

Wife and I were thoroughly enjoying a gourmet salad from one of our favorite food chains when I paused to reflect on the moment.

“You know, we have fleas to thank for introducing us to this salad!”

Awhile back, we came home from a trip to find our apartment infested with fleas. We quickly made other plans for the night and stayed with friends until it was resolved.

The next morning, I stopped by Chick-fil-A to pick up some breakfast, due to the extenuating circumstances. The sandwich wife wanted was not available for breakfast, so I returned with a grilled market salad.

Wife was initially disappointed, then said she trusted my judgment. (“I trust your judgment” is a powerful phrase to say to your spouse, by the way!)

Turns out, she loves the salad.

As do I.

Now, we get the salad instead of our previous standard order.

And it’s just odd to think we never would have tried something we now love if it weren’t for a big problem rearing its ugly head at an inconvenient.

It’s weird to think about, isn’t it? How we are forced to improvise and still come out better than before?

All the same — thank you, fleas!